1. Disconnection during conversations.
When you’re talking to someone who has been through narcissistic abuse, you might notice they sometimes zone out or seem lost in thought. It isn’t because they don’t care; it’s often a way for them to cope with feelings that can be overwhelming. As psychologist Dr. Judith Orloff explains, survivors of emotional trauma can disconnect as a defense mechanism to protect themselves from pain. Their mind might drift to a safer place, especially if they often face criticism or invalidation. So, if they seem distant during your conversation, remember that it’s their way of dealing with the emotional fallout, not a reflection of your worth or the importance of what you’re saying.
2. Hyperresponsiveness to social cues.
Narcissistic abuse victims seem sensitive to social cues. They might pick up on things others overlook; they read too much into a raised eyebrow or a sigh. This hyperresponsiveness can come from past experiences where every little detail mattered for their emotional survival. As life coach Dr. Lisa Firestone points out, people who have experienced emotional abuse often develop a heightened sensitivity to the feelings and reactions of others. Their radar is always on, trying to avoid potential conflict or rejection. So, if they seem overly cautious or interpret something you said as unfavorable, it’s likely a reflection of their past rather than your intentions.
Recommended Book: How To Kill A Narcissist: Debunking The Myth Of Narcissism And Recovering From Narcissistic Abuse.
3. Sudden emotional outbursts.
Sudden emotional outbursts are common among narcissistic abuse victims. It can be surprising and confusing, but it’s often a result of their past experiences where emotions got bottled up or dismissed. As Dr. Tara Becker says, unprocessed emotions can bubble up unexpectedly, often triggered by seemingly small things. Their reactions might seem intense because they’ve learned to suppress feelings for so long that it’s like a dam breaking when they finally surface. So, if they suddenly burst into tears or lash out, try to understand that it’s not just about the moment; it’s their way of dealing with deep-seated pain that might have been ignored for too long.
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