#1: Narcissists and old sources of supply.
Let’s talk about the first strange thing—they go back to the people they’ve hurt or ignored in the past, looking for comfort. Let’s dig into this. Think of it like a boat trying to find safe harbor in a storm. The person who’s dealing with the chaos of their own downfall rushes back to these old places, places they left behind, people they’ve upset or ignored, hoping to find peace. Imagine this: a person struggling during this hard time, trying their best to avoid facing their own truth. And the truth is, they’re not as special or amazing as they once thought they were. Actually, deep down, they’re really insecure; they’re messed up inside.
#2: Narcissists gaslighting themselves.
Narcissists often trick themselves. Yes, you understood it right—they don’t just manipulate other people, but also themselves. As they struggle with their collapsing lives, they start lying to themselves, which is really surprising. This is where the idea of “softening the blow” in really tough emotional situations comes in. Softening the blow is a way for the mind to handle really hard and painful realities; it’s a way to protect oneself, but it can cause more damage in the long run. Narcissists do this by tricking themselves. They make themselves believe that their current problems aren’t real. They live in a world in their heads where everything is great, all about them, and they’re still very important. But why do they do this? It’s because they find it too hard to face the truth of their problems and weaknesses.
A Book: Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men.
Their self-imagined greatness has been their shield against the world, and without it, they feel exposed and weak. So they run away, they run into a world they create where they’re still the most important. They change their reality, ignoring the truth, and replacing it with their own made-up story. But tricking themselves like this can be harmful. While it might make them feel better for a while, it stops them from facing their problems directly. It keeps them from growing and traps them in a destructive pattern of denial and lying to themselves. Imagine being stuck in a maze you’ve made, constantly running but never reaching anywhere. That’s what it’s like for a narcissist who deceives themselves. It’s a weird and harmful lie they tell themselves, showing how far a narcissist will go to keep thinking they’re better than everyone else.
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