Number 2: They believe every ex of theirs has mistreated them.
They genuinely believe that they have been mistreated by every single EX they were in a relationship with. How so? Well, to them, mistreatment is not giving them full authority and control, not turning into a doormat, not taking a stand against them, saying no, not fully giving in, not being compliant enough, not just taking orders from them like they own you. That is what mistreatment to a narcissist is. Mistreatment is also exposing them. Mistreatment is also demanding better treatment. That is how they see mistreatment. You do all of that, so naturally, they are going to believe that you mistreated them. They are the victim in every single story, the common denominator in any story.
Recommended Book: How To Kill A Narcissist: Debunking The Myth Of Narcissism And Recovering From Narcissistic Abuse.
A narcissist can only play one of these three roles: one, of a savior, who saved the relationship, two, the hero, the person who gets all the attention, who saved the day, three, of a victim, beyond that, they can’t do anything at all. Why? Because if they were to take responsibility, if they were to say, “I messed it up,” that would mean they’ll have to accept that there’s something wrong with them, that something is missing. They can’t do that. They have to absolve themselves of all the responsibility. They have to wash their hands of the responsibility and force it on you. Project everything on you. The only way to do that would be to take a role of a victim, somebody who was wronged. That’s why when they share those sob stories with you, they sound and seem so genuine and they are not.
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